Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Starting afresh

Funny that it just feels right to type these out right now, no reason whatsoever, perhaps just to clear my head a little.

Just because i feel like picking up where i left on this blog... so, here we go again.

Season changes. People changes. Relationship status changes. But, my relationship with my God remains.

For the past few months, it have had been trials, low downs, painful heartbreaking, the whole emotional rollercoaster ride, don't know how to put them into words, really...i'm not a wordsmith. i suck at this. It just hurt. So deep. It felt like your heart was brutally cut wide open and left  bleeding til the bloods run dry. It went on a cycle.

Some days it just ached... quietly, deep down. No one knows except your lonely soul.

It was then i felt so weak, so crushed, so broken. Because it mattered. Because i've given it all. Yet, sometimes it's not how much you've given, even when it means that you would move city just to be with the other person. Sadly...you didn't see what i see in us.

I cried out to God, for He alone knew how much pain it was, how much tears poured. For i know i can trust Him in this. Through it all.
I turned to Him. I know that I need to cling on to Him, no matter what. Through it all.

I felt lost, for a while. Finding my balance again. Finding who i am again, without you. Without you this time. I am reminded of who i am and where i should look to.

The bright unknown future. Daunting, sure. But pretty exciting too. New opportunities. New pages. And i know who holds my future. The Faithful One. So, i surrender...over and over again to you, Lord.
Take me, mold me...lead me in your righteousness.

Long story short...

I've wrapped you up. Together with the memories. It was a decision i have to commit to. To let you go.
To let the past go.

It hasn't been easy, of course.

But i know this soon shall pass too.

Goodbye to you.
I've lost a good friend.

Lord, you are the Author of my love story. You hold the pen, i trust in you as you write my love story.

      Surely your goodness and love will follow me
    all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord

-Psalm 23:6

Alright, enough said.

So, here's a toast to new chapters ahead!

No comments:

Related Posts with Thumbnails